Who is to Blame?

I'm not naturally a very graceful person. I tend to run into most everything and injure myself frequently. So, I will go ahead and apologize for how awkward I will be as I learn to dance in this season of my life.

I guess now is as good of a time as ever to share the sorrows and sufferings that inspired me to start this blog. Disclaimer: the content found in these writings is contaminated by the limited perspective of a fallen human being and the emotions, thoughts, and struggles disclosed may often come across as depressing, shocking, or offensive--reader discretion is advised. This is honesty in the purest form I know it. You have been fairly warned.

Everyone experiences hardships in this life. There are no exceptions. However, it must be stated that the God who created everything is not the one to blame. If you are blaming him, as I have at times, you can save yourself some time and stop now. Blaming God for our brokenness and pain will never solve our problems. Blame is basically using someone else as an excuse for something for which you should take responsibility. Blame is one of the main reasons why things are messed up...have you ever heard the story?

In the beginning (because as humans, we are limited in understanding anything without a beginning and an end), the One True Creator God made everything perfect, lacking nothing to be desired. He signed his name to a world that was all good and to a man and woman who, because they knew they were fully loved, knew nothing but how to love well. The Bible tells us that the first two people were named Adam and Eve. As the story goes, they believed a lie from Satan that made them question God's goodness and guidelines for living, and they took a bite out of a piece of fruit that symbolized independence from God and everything that is opposite of who he is. What Adam and Eve didn't understand is God meant what he said when he told Adam that eating of such fruit would surely bring death. God gave them that command to protect them and preserve them.

It turns out, God knew a piece of the story that Adam and Eve didn't know, probably because he knew they couldn't handle it. A war had taken place in heaven, and one of God's angels named Lucifer decided that he wanted to be worshipped instead of worshipping God, so he led a rebellion against God. As punishment, God cast Lucifer down from heaven and terminated their fellowship because God cannot associate with any form of darkness. For as the Scriptures read, "God is light. In him, there is no darkness at all."

God knew that Satan would commit himself to stealing, killing and destroying all of his creation, so he gave Adam and Eve a big heads up. But Satan is the Father of Lies, which makes sense, because he's the opposite of God, who is Truth. Satan schemed up a plan to deceive Adam and Eve into distrusting and disobeying God--he told them that God was lying to them in order to keep them from being like Himself, knowing both good AND evil. Satan knew, from experience, that no one can handle the knowledge of evil and still be in fellowship with God.

Well, Eve took a huge bite out of evil, and she gave some to her husband Adam. And immediately, the damage took place. They felt naked and ashamed instead of fully accepted and loved (sound familiar?). They hid themselves to keep what they had done a secret, out of fear of punishment (hitting home yet?).But God found them, and in agony and sorrow, he asked Adam who had told them these lies. What did Adam do? He blamed Eve. There was no remorse or humility-just blame. God then questioned Eve as to why she would dishonor him in this way, and what did she do? She blamed Satan, who was represented by a snake in this story. What did Satan have to say for himself? We are never told. Why? Because he had already accomplished what he set out to accomplish. Mankind was now separated from God by the evil in their hearts. And no being can live apart from God...away from relationship with him, there is only death.

Have you ever wanted to blame Adam and Eve for the way the world has gone to pot? I've done that too. But the reality is, we would have made the same decision then, and we have made the same decision in our own lives. No one does what is right by nature, and no one seeks out God on his own accord. We can't blame God. He is the only reason we know life. He created us, and any student of the human body knows we are wonderfully made.

But back to the story--God knows everything, and he wouldn't have created us knowing the decision we were going to make in response to Satan's nonsense without having a plan to bring us back to him. That plan involved a mystery that we can only comprehend as well as a small child can put together a 1000 piece puzzle of a forest without ever having seen a tree.

God is more complex than anything we can fathom, but he has made every effort to reveal who he is to us in his word, the Bible. He tells us that he is three persons that communion together so closely that they converge as One being. God calls himself the Father. He has another part named Jesus whom he refers to as his Son, and the third part is known as the Counselor or Holy Spirit.

God decided to send his Son Jesus to come to earth, to take on flesh, and to die in our place to pay for all our evil so that we could walk with him again. God broke his perfect fellowship with himself to graft us back in. Our physical bodies will die--it doesn't take long for us to realize that our bodies are wearing out. Not only that, but the entire world will also wear out like an old garment. We are all groaning for redemption. And that liar, Satan, will be destroyed along with all evil!

At first, it's easy for us all to look forward to that day...the day when all the evil in the world is burned up forever, but here is the sobering reality: every one of us is a part of that evil to be destroyed.

The Bible puts it this way: All people have done evil and fallen short of the goodness of God (Romans 3:23). And the payment for evil is death (Romans 6:23). As one of my favorite rappers Lecrae puts it in the song "Truth":

"Some people say that God ain't real 'cause they don't see how a good God can exist with all this evil in the world. If God is real then He should stop all this evil, 'cause He's all-powerful right? What is evil though man? It's anything that's against God. It's anything morally bad or wrong. It's murder, rape, stealing, lying, cheating. But if we want God to stop evil, do we want Him to stop it all or just a little bit of it? If He stops us from doing evil things, what about lying, or what about our evil thoughts? I mean, where do you stop, the murder level, the lying level, or the thinking level? If we want Him to stop evil, we gotta be consistent, we can't just pick and choose. That means you and I would be eliminated right? Because we think evil stuff. If that's true, we should be eliminated! But thanks be to God that Jesus stepped in to save us from our sin! Christ died for all evilness! Repent, turn to Jesus man!"

Every human being deserves the punishment that awaits Satan because if we are honest with ourselves, each and every one of us chooses to live independently of God, which inevitably leaves a trail of wounded people in our path as we strive towards trying to make a name for ourselves.

It's also easy to feel false security in playing the Pharisee role...in other words, I know it's comfortable to compare the good things I do with all the bad things I see in others in order to feel good about myself. But Scripture makes it pretty clear that religion, when it becomes a set of rules alone without a relationship with God, actually angers God more than the worst of tax collectors.

Jesus describes it like this: "If you were blind, you would not be guilty of sin, but now that you claim you can see, your guilt remains (John 9:41)." In other words, if you were willing to admit you are in need of God, I would be willing to be all you need, but instead, you claim to know God while acting against all that he stands for, and for that, your evil is yours to pay for.

...I am sharing all of this for a reason. I want to make sure that, before I talk about my struggles and questions, I make the commitment to never blame God or blame others. Those are two sure actions that have no chance of contributing to a remedy. I have to take full responsibility for my life. I cannot control the events that happen, but I can choose my response. To respond well, I admit I'll need help...Help from God and help from others who know him better than I do.

Sorry about the seriousness of this entry. I will follow my husband's advice and call this one a minefield. The next entry will be more of a dance.

Choosing to Dance

This is my attempt to dance despite the many mines that have detonated inside me and around me on my journey through the mine-covered lands of this broken world.

In the afterglow of the bombs that have burst, you will find me wrestling with the shears of metal that remain buried in my body and soul. I know what it's like to stand paralyzed in fear of taking another step, as my bleeding wounds warn me of what mines may await my next move.

But this blog is a commitment to myself, my champion husband, and my God that nothing shy of dancing in this minefield is sufficient. To stand still may feel safe, but it is a feigned security because in doing so, you are robbed of any hopes of having purpose, joy, or impacting the lives of anyone else.

I know you too have experienced immobilizing pain that cripples, shames, discourages, and enslaves--would you be willing to take the next step with me? From one simple life to another, would you dare to dance? I promise, you won't be alone.